Books That Talk About How Technology Can Own Your Life – Or Not!

 

 

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A few decades ago, we never imagined that we’d be able to send photos to our loved ones through this big term called the Internet. We talked on a wired telephone with our families, and when we’re apart, we would cry ourselves to sleep and wait for months before we could see each other again. Now, distance is somehow made shorter through Skype, Face Time, and other video call applications, and we no longer feel so far away from our loved ones.

Another popular channel these days that have the young and the old addicted is YouTube. However, others find it irritating and annoying that people would find it great to be uploading videos of themselves doing something, despite the fact that they’ve gotten so popular for doing so. These people are what you call the influencers. And YouTube is only one of the many features of the new age that have brought good and bad for us. These features make us realize that new technology does have a cost.

Below is a list of books that you might want to read if you want to learn about how technology has managed to invade our lives, helped us in so many ways, yet has hooked us all to everything – the pros and the cons – to the point of owning our lives. Perhaps through these books, you will be able to find ways to NOT let it own yours!

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Manage Your Day-to-Day: Build Your Routine, Find Your Focus, And Sharpen Your Creative Mind – Jocelyn K. Glei

A collection of notes and excerpts from the world’s most creative brains, this book emphasizes the importance of having quiet time so that one can become truly creative. Amidst the glaring notifications of Facebook, LinkedIn, and other apps on our phones, the author points out that one must learn to focus on being able to extract himself from the hustle and bustle of the Internet and return to particular the task at hand. If you are one of those who are anxious about spending too much time with Instagram, start reading this now.

The Attention Merchants: The Epic Scramble To Get Inside Our Heads – Tim Wu

Warning: this book is not for the weak and sensitive. It’s a wakeup call to us about how much of our time is being pulled by advertisements, new phone launches, app improvements, and many more. The important commodity being fought for here is our attention, which these major tech companies have gotten from us. But if we try to be more aware of the time and money that we waste every time we watch and crave for these new gadgets, perhaps they won’t be so influential in our lives.

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Irresistible: The Rise Of Addictive Technology And The Business Of Keeping Us Hooked – Adam Alter

You won’t put this down book before finishing it. The story of Steve Jobs presenting iPad to an amazing audience, and words taken from his interview stating that he strictly prohibits his children to the gadget frequently because of its ill side effects is pretty eye-opening. Irresistible tells the tales of the digital inventors, how they influence us to dream about having all these devices, and their full knowledge of the impact of these devices on our emotional and mental well-being. This line borrowed from the book says it all: don’t get high on their supply.”

The New Brain: How The Modern Age Is Rewiring Your Mind – Dr. Richard Restak

The author divulges some of the answers to his questions about modern technology and whether or not the brain is physically affected by it. Can smartphone, tablet, and other gadget use relatively cause a rise in attention deficit cases? What does the brain possibly look like when it’s exposed to too much screen time and blue light?

Conclusion

These are only some of the few great books that have led me to write this blog, not primarily because I love them but because these books have become eye-openers for me to become more vigilant with the way I utilize the technological devices that have been helping me make life easier. I hope you learn some lessons too. If you do, send us a comment here.

All in all, these books do a marvelous job of taking a fairly objective approach to the pros and cons of technological advancement in our society. Technology has done wonders for us in terms of communication, productivity, and even personal expression. But it’s equally important to be aware of the costs that come with that newfound territory.

 

 

 

Music And Its Ways Of Affecting Our Mood And Productivity

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I haven’t actually met one person in this life who doesn’t appreciate one kind of music. We all love to listen to that wonderful theme song from our favorite movie or the usual song that’s played over the radio every morning. We hum the wedding song of our best friend like it’s our own wedding song and we instantly feel magical!

Music has various ways of penetrating through our minds and change the way we feel. It helps us relax, it makes us cry, it excites us, and often times it makes us feel so much better. Recently, a study on several employees in different workplaces has proven that music also has the capacity to increase productivity. Does it really?

Most of us turn to music to change the mood that we are feeling for the day or to set the tone of our atmosphere wherever we are. And despite the many distractions and methods that have been laid down before us these days – television, video games, computer, smartphones – we’ve always looked for a familiar tune or a fresh one to somehow help us move forward and progress throughout the day.

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Music And Productivity

Going back to the study mentioned above, which was done by professors in a music therapy program, the said study showed that those employees who listened to their favorite music while they were working accomplished their jobs quickly and even presented better ideas than the rest of those who were working without music. However, there are specific genres of music that don’t have an effect on productivity and even worsen it. Some researchers reported that other types of music caused people to get distracted, unable to understand what they were reading, or experienced a decrease in the way they processed information. Thus, it proved that music could have a positive and negative on various kinds of individuals and at different circumstances.

As for me, I can work well with jazz and mellow music, but I feel annoyed when rap or pop music is being played especially when I’m trying to read a mystery book that I need to understand. My sister, on the other hand, loves to listen to dance music when she’s studying for her midterm exams. She says she can process her notes much better. Perhaps these factors determine whether or not music is distracting or stimulating.

·      The Lyrics Of The Song. Some lyrics of a song are simple enough that you don’t have to listen and understand them, which is why I guess it’s stimulating for my sister to listen to dance music because then she is more focused on the beat rather than the words of the song.

 

·      The Type Of Task You Are Doing. This is obvious. When you’re multitasking at the office, like making phone calls and writing some notes, rock music can’t help you concentrate at all, but maybe instrumental or jazz music can. It helps you relax and be stimulated at the same time, making you do your work quickly and effectively.

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·      Genre And Structure Of The Song. I love Aerosmith but I don’t think it’ll get me to finish a speech that I’m making for a parents/teachers meeting. If I’m at home having a manicure, I can listen to the band playing She’s Amazing with a smile on my face.

There isn’t really one situation where music is effective for everyone because each of us turns to music for different reasons. Music impacts us in different ways too. Classical music, for example, is said to be stimulating to the brain, which usually works for those who are very young and do not understand the meaning of music, and those who are more mature. For those in between, they won’t probably appreciate it is\ being classical or being brain activating.

Did you hear of epic music? If you haven’t, then you are not someone who was born during the times when the epic was magical! The likes of the baby boomers and the millennials are some of the groups of individuals who love to listen to epic music to motivate them at work or just want some inspiration.

You might have listened to ambient music in bars or as background music in an airport, but you didn’t know it was called ambient. This type of music has instruments all over it. It can be lovely to the ears and you won’t mind listening to it in a crowded place like an airport or a café, because it’s tolerable as it is wonderful.

Takeaway

No matter what kind of music you want to listen on your specific type of mood each day, the point is that it has become a significant part of our lives and I couldn’t imagine living without it. Can you?

 

 

Top Songs That Are Relaxing, According to Science (Psychologists Agree To This)

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They say that meditation and yoga can be relaxing but listening to songs can be a form of relaxation too. A study conducted by researchers and psychologists have shown that listening to songs is a form of stress relief and have a lot of calming benefits. 

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Psychologist: How To Take Better Control Of Your Life

Do you often find yourself in a situation where you are clueless about what you are doing? Is it hard or difficult on your part to find your purpose in life? Are you interested in changing your life for the better? If you answered yes to these inquiries, then you came at the right site. For today’s article, we are going to share some of the smart tips and tricks that everyone needs to remember when it comes to taking better control of one’s life. Before anything else, we want to disclose that all the information in this post are inspired from one of our conversations with an expert psychologist who was kind enough to share to us some of the effective strategies that he knows.

 

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Before anything else, it is crucial for you to understand that the secret to a happy life is to know how to control your thoughts and emotions. You must reach a certain level of mindfulness where nothing or nobody can destroy. It can be challenging if you are still at the starting point of making it happen. However, you must never give up because everything is possible as long as you take the processes seriously. Make sure that you learn all the tips mentioned below so that you can gain a better understanding and control of the circumstances that come your way. Here is the list to take note of:

 

Get The Right Amount Of Sleep

 

In whatever you do, be sure that you do not take sleep for granted. No matter how crazy your schedule is, it is essential for you not to skip on a good night’s rest. Remember that sleepless nights will not make you cranky the following day. At the same time, it can also affect your cognitive functions that can eventually lead to a lack of interest in making the right decisions. Aside from this, it can also adversely affect your point as it can prevent you from seeing things clearly or processing information correctly. On the other hand, if you are well-rested daily, there is a high tendency that you will have a presence of mind in everything that you do. As a result, you will make better choices for yourself.

 

Start The Day Right

 

Once you wake up early in the morning, be sure to say affirmations to yourself Repeat it every single day until you get used to it. Take note that starting the day with positivity can be good for you and everyone surrounding you. It is recommended to keep yourself away from anything that can distract you from being productive early in the morning. For example, you must refrain from checking your mobile phones while you are still in bed. The right thing to do is to say your affirmations, get up, have your breakfast and prepare for the day. Once you have already completed these things, then use your extra time to check your online messages, emails, or social media accounts. All you need is at least twenty-one days to continuously do everything so that you can make it a routine.

 

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Keep Negativity Away

 

As already mentioned above, positivity plays an essential role in your success in life. It is the primary reason why you must work hard to have it in every aspect of your day-to-day life. To make things a lot easier on your part, it is ideal for keeping yourself away from anything or anyone that causes stress or anxiety. Keep in mind that you deserve the peace of mind. Once you notice that a friend or work colleague is always getting into your nerves, be mature enough to cut ties, and maintain professionalism. You do not need to hang out or be with someone who makes you feel stressed or anxious at all times. Consequently, find a way to determine who are the nice persons in your life right now and make sure to foster your relationships with them.

 

Conclusion

 

The last and essential thing that you must never forget is to find peace in your heart. As much as possible, stop getting angry or mad at someone for a long time. Train yourself not to hold any grudge to the people who have hurt you. Instead, accept the reality that not everyone deserves to stay in your life. What matters the most is that you know how to forgive those who have caused you pain. Free yourself from any negativity so that you can find peace and happiness within you.

 

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Therapist Guidelines To Knowing Ourselves Fully

You don’t have to a therapist to agree that a personality introduction is typical for us humans. Its factors consist of skills, capabilities, intellect, flexibility, contentment, and social involvement. With all these things we thought are essential often make us forget about one thing – knowing ourselves. That is because it is our nature to pay too much attention to everything around us. With that uncalled for attention towards other things that seem a little off, it leads us to pay less attention to ourselves. But how can we judge ourselves? How can we determine who we are? How can we know how far we can become?

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Is It Dependent On The Quality Of Life?

There is a belief that the quality of our lives is mostly determined by how we carry ourselves around the public. There is the a concern on what type of clothes should we wear, what kind of job should we take, what kinds of food should we eat, what characters of people should we hang out, what model of car should we park outside, what representation of home should we live in, and so on. It is often about status and achievement. But honestly, that is not entirely important. Instead, it is about the capacity of happiness and fulfillment we can obtain from unfortunate instances that we cannot control. It is about knowing how far we are willing to take risk, sacrifice, and make amends to the betterment of the situation. We believe that everything that happens in our lives is from the consequences of the things we do. Perhaps, it is. We can set impossible goals for our happiness. But that claim does not entirely support the totality of understanding what makes us who we are. Our status and quality of life mean little to less than nothing.

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Can We Know Ourselves Through Our Action And Words?

The process often used to determine oneself is through actions and words. People judge each other with how they act and respond according to mild and complicated situations. There is this mentality that those people who share and help others are the good ones. And those who do not lend a hand are the bad ones. Same goes to the utilization of words. Those people who often talk, curse, and say mean things get viewed as evil persons, while those individuals who often choose their words appropriately gets perceived as educated and well-mannered ones. Yes, both cases don’t seem to contradict the logic of knowing someone through impression. However, it is not often the case. Not all people who do good things in front of others are good people. And not all those individuals who talk too much impoliteness are all terrible people. Everything is a matter of looking through everyone else’s other side of the story.

Can Our Choices And Decisions In Life Determine Who We Are?

In most instances, our choices and decisions in life matter most. Whether it is about sticking into a belief that others do not agree upon, or staying true to a crooked principle that no one value. Either way, we end up creating a verdict as to how we see things around us. But in determining the kind of persons we are, our life choices and decisions do not entirely represent the whole perception of what can we become. Instead, it is both the mistakes and results of the choices we make. Everything lies in the ability to face and conquer the consequences of the decisions we chose, whether it is right or wrong. We can never tell and make everyone agree that we are competent individuals. That is because we live in imperfections. We can never imply that what we do poorly is just the result of emotional and mental struggle. No one will believe it and will genuinely picture it only as an excuse.

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So How Can We Know Ourselves?

The truth is, knowing ourselves is genuinely hard. That is because every time we experience something in our lives, we often change our perception. We learn through the process of getting hurt. We become engaged when we are down and become weak when we are alone. We start changing views when there is a change in our environment. We see things differently every day. There is no consistency in knowing. But fortunately, we are aware of who we are and what we can become. Every one of us has an idea of how much we can be willing to become someone we are supposed to be.

How Can I Stop Projecting Onto Others?

 

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Jean-Paul Sartre, a reputable philosopher, once stated that hell is other people. Do you feel that way, like you see hell and rage in other people? I do. And I am struggling to find ways to avoid lashing out especially towards my family and significant others. There are just moments when I think of past hurts, and someone comes over to talk to me about anything, and I find him annoying or irritating. What’s worst, I can’t help but shout at him and say, “Can you please get out of my face?”

I’d like to think that all of us have experienced feeling this way. Often, a coworker distracts us from whatever we’re focusing on perhaps just to invite us for a snack, but you told him to go away. Or your mom’s bossy nature pushes you to snap and bang your door behind her. And then you think to yourself, “I will never find peace until they change who they are.”

Identifying Projection

These thoughts we have about other people and how they are the cause of our misery are often wrong. According to psychologists, we attribute the qualities we hate in ourselves to other people, and then those people distract us and make us mad when they bluntly tell us what traits we’re trying to hide.

Some of us (yes, I included), in our efforts to deny a trait that we don’t like about ourselves, dare to tell others, “I am not like that, and never will I be,” so that attention is repelled towards the other person. And yet when that person gives up and disowns that particular trait, some other person will come into your life and trigger you with that trait. It will almost always be like that until you learn to acknowledge that you want so much to reject that trait in yourself! Psychotherapist Joseph Burgo describes this as one’s innate affinity towards integration.

I am sharing what I have learned through research and online articles about stopping projection off its tracks and preventing it from destroying our new and old relationships. Here are some tips on how to combat this devious defense mechanism.

 

Innate Traits We Need To Overcome

  • Ego. We sometimes tend to think that we’re almost always perfect in our ways, which has its disadvantages. This is why when someone challenges our views, we get angry and often blame other people for causing us to feel that way, when in fact we did that to ourselves.
  • Habit. The habit of blaming other people for making us feel what we don’t want to feel is difficult to stop. We may have been projecting for so long to a person or a group; this pattern may be so embedded that it becomes a natural defense against anything unpleasant for us.

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  • Decreased Awareness. I, for one, was not conscious that I was actually projecting my rage and worry towards my husband. I just noticed it not so long ago, when I felt signs like stress, tension, and mental preoccupation.
  • Fatigue. When we are over-worked and exhausted, we easily succumb to our temper and emotions, which is why we are inclined to project how we feel onto other people.
  • Emotional Resistance. The entire point of projection is to unburden ourselves of our anxiety, grief, anger, and shame onto other people. Thus, it is typical that we try not to acknowledge these feelings and what we have done to destroy our relationships. Of course, when we finally do, we don’t take the projection back simply because it hurts.
  • Dehumanization. It is the process of assigning a symbol to the person we are projecting into. We don’t see him wholly as a person, but as the mean boss or the clingy jerk. They become a representation of the things you hate.

Tips In Stopping Projection

  • Be Calm. When you feel the temper starting to swallow your mind and body, take a few breaths, four counts to inhale and eights to exhale. This has been a proven method of calming oneself down.
  • Don’t Be Too Preoccupied. The projection has features that separate it from simple annoyance or irritation. The most obvious is focusing too much on the other person, with accompanying beliefs that you are and will never be that other person. There’s so much self-justification in projection.
  • Look Inside You. Projection is technically turning towards another person, or turning outward. And the best cure for this quality is practicing self-awareness. Connect with your inner self and how you can fight negativity. This will help control your obsession towards your target person and instead shift your attention to better things.
  • Be Real. Psychotherapist Burgo agrees that problematic individuals may have the same negative traits that you disown yourself from. However, we frequently project what is real. For instance, if you are a nagger, you will tend to project it towards someone who is a nagger. Only that being a nagger is not their only trait. They have other traits too, some positive.

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  • Show Empathy. When you’re empathic, you try to imagine yourself in the other person’s shoes, imagine living his life. This way, you might be able to stop thinking of him as someone who is out there to destroy you, but perhaps like, you, he is also struggling to be the best person despite the challenges.

 

 

 

 

The Amazing Benefits of Dancing

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A lot of us are not sufficiently active on a regular basis. We often don’t fulfill even half of the exercise regimen that we ought to do for us to be mentally and physically healthy. We should know by now that our bodies are not built to be stagnant and still for a long time – unless we are being a couch potato and just watching television the whole day, working on a desk for 8 to 16 hours, or sleeping for most of the day. These activities are a surefire way to develop back pain, obesity and ultimately stroke and heart attack.

This only means that the best way to encourage ourselves to move is to perform activities that are not work-related that we can do in our homes. Dancing is one of the top choices. It’s not only fun but also being skilled at dancing is tremendously good for one’s health.

Below is a list of some amazing mental and physical benefits of dance.

It Improves Flexibility. Dancing teaches one to be flexible, as most fast dance types require kicks, dips, grinds, and even jumps. If you’re part of a dance group, you will be engaged in hours of warm-up sessions that will involve simple and complicated stretches. Improving your flexibility decreases your chances of getting injured.

It Helps You Lose Weight. Anyone who has tried doing several moves daily will attest that dancing is a fun way to lose those flabs. You don’t need to punish yourself by not eating your favorite food. Maybe just consume a little, and then join a dance class instead of sweating it out in the gym or going for night runs. That’s way more serious and boring than dancing, right? Dance is something you can do for fun and health reasons, plus you get to meet new friends.

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It Develops Good Posture. Incorrect posture from working on the computer for hours or wrong sleeping positions often result in a permanent slouch with the shoulders forward and the spine bent. If this is not corrected, a person may not be able to breathe properly, as his lungs are unable to expand fully because of the slouch. To be a good dancer, you must maintain a confident aura, one with her head held high, shoulders rolled backward, and chest out. This position prevents back pain and keeps the joints aligned and the whole body symmetrical.

It Enhances Balance. Ballet – hip hop ballet if you want something more active – entails the heavy use of the legs and feet. Therefore, you must have the balancing skills to avoid injury. Practicing this skill builds muscle strength, especially from your core, back and leg muscles. Routines such as balancing on one foot would also require focus and concentration; thus you are able to improve your mental health as well.

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Sets A Happy Mood. As an art and a sport, dancing releases toxins and endorphins at the same time. These happy hormones improve one’s mood and decrease one’s chances of experiencing anxiety or depression.

Bottom Line

Undeniably, dancing is a fantastic way of achieving a great body and a mentally healthy mind. It is an all-around activity that not only makes you a star in the future, but a confident individual that is fit, toned, and beautiful.

 

Adult ADHD: How To Improve Your Communication Skills (Therapy Necessary Too!)

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It is a challenge to have ADHD especially when you’re an adult. You are considered lucky if the issue – Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder – was diagnosed early on and you’ve had therapy sessions. The problem will affect your life, that is, if you have been suffering from it without treatment.

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Tupac, His Music, And Me (Us Against The World)

I heard his name but was not interested in knowing who he is.   I heard so many bad things about him, a gangster whose music is not good for the kids to listen to.  In short, I was not a fan.  I thought back then his music was all noise.  But one day as I was on the bus, his music played.  “Dear Mama” put me into tears right at my seat.   Oh my!

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